I tend to oscillate between being very spiritual and woo-woo or I’m the total opposite of that and phrases like “divine feminine” or “orgasmic enlightenment” making me want to roll my eyes. I’m in the latter phase right now.
I purchased a pair of two jade eggs a little over a year ago but I’ve never been consistent with my use of it, even now that I’ve officially commenced my “jade egg journey.” Honestly, I’ve been feeling really frustrated with it and confused. There is so much conflicting information out there about the “proper way” to use a jade egg. Do you wear it all day? Should you leave it in over night? Can you just put it in and exercise your pelvic floor with it or do you have to warm yourself up first and let your vagina “sip” the egg in when she’s ready? How long do you practice with it?
But the contradictory information is the least of my concern. I can try out different approaches, see which ones work for me and trust my own personal experience. What really frustrates me however, is when popular gurus or vaginal weightlifters say highly misleading things like “all you need is 5 minutes of practice a day for 2 weeks to see major results.”
That may be true for a small subset of people. That may be true for experienced vaginal weightlifters who have already built up their strength and they just need to maintain it. But it is not true for the average vagina owner, myself included. Not by a long shot.
The vagina, sexual wellness, and pelvic floor strengthening have always been sort of mysterious and kept hush-hush. And on top off all that, with this surge of woo-woo spiritual “divine feminine” stuff popping up on the interwebs, it’s become this mystical thing. An ancient secret used by courtesans in China thousands of years ago. And when things are framed as being beyond what we know as normal or outside of modern science because it’s supposedly some mystical or ancient secret from non-western cultures, it makes it that much easier for us to suspend our disbelief and accept what ever it is that some online guru is telling us without stopping to think and check our expectations.
If any personal trainer told you that you could have a rock hard 6 pack abs in just 2 weeks with only 5 minutes of practice per day even though you’ve never done an ab workout before in your life, you would know that they’re not being completely honest.
If someone told me that I could add 2 inches to my booty and get a butt like a Kardashian in just 2 weeks with only 5 minutes of exercise per day, I would tell them that they’re full of shit.
Our vaginas are no exception.
The pelvic floor, just like our glutes and our abs, is a collection of muscles. And strengthening and growing any muscle takes a lot more than just 5 minutes a day for 2 weeks.
I’ve been reading the original research by Dr. Arnold H. Kegel (yes that kegel!) and what the research actually shows is that Dr. Kegel instructed his patients to do their vaginal exercises (aka kegels but he didn’t call them that) for 3 sessions every day with each session lasting 20 minutes. Yes that’s a total of 1 hour of just pelvic floor exercises every single day.
For 5 to 8 weeks.
No wonder the 2 weeks for 5 minutes a day that I heard from this guru isn’t working! It sets up totally unrealistic expectations which I never really stopped to question until I read the research. I also recently learned that I was contracting the wrong muscles when I was doing my kegels and using the correct muscles is essential according to Dr. Kegel.
The regimen prescribed by Dr. Kegel seems excessive but 1 hour per day dedicated entirely to the exercise of the pelvic floor muscles for at least 5 weeks is a much more reasonable time to start seeing results. But it’s only the beginning and everyone will have a different experience with their pelvic strengthening journey and the time it takes to see results. The most important thing is that we set realistic expectations for ourselves that are grounded in either our own direct experiences or scientific research- not what some other person says and especially when that other person is trying to sell you a vaginal weightlifting online course for hundreds of dollars. When we don’t have realistic expectations for ourselves, we put ourselves at risk for deciding that something doesn’t work too early on in the process and giving up.
The journey to improve sexual health and pelvic floor strength is indeed a journey. And with any exercise journey, it’s never really over. So don’t give up!